19. Firefighters, Zipper Jeans, Capitalism

Rekindling our flame with guest panelist Jason, we add firefighters, zipper jeans (both with and without underwear) and capitalism to the List of Every Damn Thing.
Phil and Jake and Jason add fuel the List of Every Damn Thing by ranking firefighters, zipper jeans, the wearing of zipper jeans without underwear, and capitalism.

If you have something to add to the List of Every Damn Thing, let us know by sending an email to list@everydamnthing.net (or get at us on Twitter and Instagram).

  • According to Phil and Jason, fear of clowns (aka coulrophobia) is fake. Jake remains undecided.
  • We mention John Wayne Gacy (the inspiration for Jason’s clown name) in passing, but don’t get into the details.
  • Dan White-- murderer of San Francisco Supervisor Harvey Milk & Mayor George Moscone-- also intended to kill future mayor Willie Brown and Carol Ruth Silver (who were both on the SF Board of Supervisors).
  • Jim Jones was very involved in San Francisco politics, including Moscone’s mayoral campaign. The site of his People’s Temple is now a post office, not a fancy bakery like Jake says. The fancy bakery is next door, where the KFC / Taco Bell used to be.
  • Rickey Henderson a fantastic leadoff hitter for the Oakland A’s and many other teams. We did an unsuccessful (and frankly unthorough) internet search for evidence of the to-scale hologram Rickey Henderson poster that Jake once saw in Amsterdam. Amsterdam is a trippy place, man. 
  • Scott Glenn plays a firefighter who is also secretly a fire-starter in both Backdraft and Firestorm.
  • It occurred to us after recording that if you’re interviewing to be a firefighter and they ask you your favorite Def Leppard album, don’t say Pyromania. It’s a trick question.
  • Here’s a Smithsonian article about 19th Century firefighter-fighters, and here’s the scene from Gangs of New York that depicts it.
  • Phil played dumb about the tagline for Aliens vs. Predator, which is “No matter who wins, we lose!”. We’ve never seen the movie but have heard it’s awful for both franchises.
  • Here’s the Unsolved Mysteries Stockton pyromaniac episode that Jason references.
  • Australia seems to be light years ahead of the rest of the world in hunky fireman calendar science.
  • Here’s a college newspaper announcement  for one of the firefighter chili cookoffs Jason attended as a self-describe "fat kid". Firefighter pancake breakfasts are also a thing.
  • Here’s the Ear Hustle episode about formerly-incarcerated firefighters. Governor Newsome signed AB 2147 into full effect in 2020, making it easier for inmates trained in firefighting to gain employment as firefighters after release.
  • Toxic masculinity is a real tough concept to get across in an image, but maybe this does it.
  • We couldn’t find the children’s book about fireboats that Phil mentioned, but rest assured it anthropomorphizes the fireboat that saves San Francisco during the earthquake.
  • While looking for a depiction of the commonly-searched phrase “shirtless men wearing elaborate angel wings, gold lame shorts and furry cha-cha heels” we found out we’re the top result! That’s called results!
  • Gideon Sundback is the guy most commonly associated with development of the zipper, which he patented in 1909. Today, the YKK Fastening Products Group has 45% of the zipper market locked up!
  • In the episode, Jake tells a story about his ding-dong. It’s believed that “dong” first became associated with the penis because of  Edward Lear's poem “The Dong with a Luminous Nose” which tells the story of a one-eyed creature attempting to find a lady.
  • Here’s the Going Commando Reddit that Jason refers to in the podcast.
  • The Beta Brand Jeans product that Jason brings up is called the Free Baller!
  • Were thong clips a thing? If you're sitting on any evidence, let us know.
  • We went pretty easy on capitalism. It got lucky. This time.
  • Britney Spears’ birthday was yesterday. Happy belated! Free her?

Set it Off (starring Queen Latifah) * Dalmatians * firefighter planes * Charmander * Dolly Parton * Steve Buscemi as a firefighter * Levi’s * pubes * penis mutilation * visible penis lines aka VPLs * jaw surgery * whale tails * China * Daylight Saving Time

Below is the List of Every Damn Thing as of this episode (for the most up-to-date list, go here):

  1. Dolly Parton - person
  2. Prince - person
  3. Cher - person
  4. Donald Duck - fictional character
  5. Hank Williams - person
  6. air - substance
  7. Watchmen - comic book
  8. onions - food
  9. “Midnight Train to Georgia” - music
  10. sex - idea
  11. firefighters - people
  12. The Three Stooges - comedy act
  13. intro to “Back That Azz Up” - music
  14. dilapidated shacks - structures
  15. shirtless men wearing elaborate angel wings, gold lamé shorts & furry cha-cha heels - idea
  16. plants - life form
  17. handkerchiefs - accessory
  18. nail clippers - tool
  19. rye bread - food
  20. cubed ice - substance
  21. Antoni Gaudi - architect
  22. Run the Jewels - music group
  23. land - substance
  24. Charmander - fictional character
  25. A-shirts (aka “wifebeaters”) - clothing
  26. “Dancing Queen” - music
  27. Watchmen - TV series
  28. Jessica Rabbit - fictional character
  29. Volkswagen “Bug” - vehicle
  30. Cheech and Chong - comedy act
  31. “Tulsa Time” - music
  32. cold brew shandy - beverage
  33. Jersey Shore - location
  34. crows - animal
  35. sea - substance
  36. coffee - beverage
  37. Whoppers - food
  38. national debt - idea 
  39. band t-shirts - clothing
  40. Crocs - clothing
  41. Ice Cube - person
  42. moist - word
  43. lightning rounds - idea
  44. zipper jeans - clothing
  45. generation ships - idea
  46. sardines - animal
  47. Tommy Bahama shirts - clothing
  48. zipper jeans  worn with no underwear - situation
  49. Barry Bonds - person
  50. man-bun - hairstyle
  51. toe shoes - clothing
  52. “Do You Know the Way to San Jose” - song
  53. Watchmen - movie
  54. blood - substance
  55. Oreos - food
  56. The Last Starfighter - movie
  57. crushed ice - substance
  58. pigeons - animal
  59. Daylight Saving Time - idea
  60. capitalism - idea
  61. sports team jerseys - clothing
  62. Josta - beverage 
  63. Gambit - fictional character
  64. Surge - beverage
  65. Double Stuf Oreos - food
  66. Jenny McCarthy - person
  67. Hank Williams, Jr - person
  68. QAnon - idea

The theme song for this episode is by Jade Puget.

Graphic design by Jason Mann.

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